A Void

Neural surge when I have the urge to reconcile Emotional load and I've been told to wait a while Burden to you and I know it's true but I disbelieve You've been gone for far too long but I didn't leave Can't get through when all I do is deny I want to stay, you've gone away, I cry Your reasons are sound -- if I'm around it's hard I never know that it's time to go, dismantle and discard If this is me then I can't see a way To ever be your friend I carry too much and am starved for touch And I never see the end for the end Can't get through when all I do is deny I want to stay, you've gone away, I cry Your reasons are sound -- if I'm around it's hard I never know that it's time to go, dismantle and discard Don't know why I need to be reassured Held and beheld, seen and deeply heard I know it's always been this way And it's the reason you'll never stay Can't get through when all I do is deny I want to stay, you've gone away, I cry Your reasons are sound -- if I'm around it's hard I never know that it's time to go, dismantle and discard Can't get through when all I do is deny I want to stay, you've gone away, I cry Your reasons are sound -- if I'm around it's hard I never know that it's time to go, dismantle and discard

With a heavy heart, I dance alone In a sea of bodies cold as stone We said farewell one too many times Wine and promises, we drew our lines We drew our lines, and leapt them too easily In our minds, but inside so sick and queasily We'd be here together but the tears became too much So I dance in a sea of bodies numb to their touch With a heavy heart (we said farewell) I dance alone (one too many times) In a sea of bodies (wine and promises) Cold as stone (we drew our lines) With a heavy heart (we said farewell) I dance alone (one too many times) In a sea of bodies (wine and promises) Cold as stone (we drew our lines) With a heavy heart (we said farewell) I dance alone (one too many times) In a sea of bodies (wine and promises) Cold as stone (we drew our lines) With a heavy heart (we said farewell) I dance alone (one too many times) In a sea of bodies (wine and promises) Cold as stone (we drew our lines) We drew our lines, and leapt them too easily In our minds, but inside so sick and queasily We'd be here together but the tears became too much So I dance in a sea of bodies numb to their touch

On sacred ground, in an honest place The awful sound, cries of disgrace No priestess to hear your confessions No people to witness your concessions In the shadows you lie To save yourself you deny Without a penance to cry Soothe yourself with strange lullaby Secrets abound, given too much space Your admissions were found to be lacking in taste No judgement exists that will free you No goddess's kiss, she can't see you In the shadows you lie To save yourself you deny Without a penance to cry Soothe yourself with strange lullaby You cast around for a friendly face Tear the altar down, shame and abase No mercy within to forgive you Your stories of sin will outlive you In the shadows you lie To save yourself you deny Without a penance to cry Soothe yourself with strange lullaby In the shadows you lie To save yourself you deny Without a penance to cry Soothe yourself with strange lullaby In the shadows you lie To save yourself you deny Without a penance to cry Soothe yourself with strange lullaby

I dragged myself into the light I hope that I'm doing this right I hope the sorrow that I'll feel tomorrow Finally makes you feel alright I've cut the cord The things I do don't depend on you I'll walk away from what we've gone through I'll stop wondering if it was true Because what else can I do I dragged myself into the light So we no longer need to fight I am nothing to you So now you are too Doesn't matter if I no longer delight I've cut the cord The things I do don't depend on you I'll walk away from what we've gone through I'll stop wondering if it was true Because what else can I do I've dragged myself out of my pain But I'd do it all over again Every moment was real That's just how I feel Though it cracked under the strain I've cut the cord The things I do don't depend on you I'll walk away from what we've gone through I'll stop wondering if it was true Because what else can I do I've cut the cord The things I do don't depend on you I'll walk away from what we've gone through I'll stop wondering if it was true Because what else can I do

This time abandoned Finally I could see everything I needed You can't give to me Lonely liberty, my identity It never was about you Just uncertainty, I'm crawling out from under Unending misery Lonely liberty, my identity, I rise from another nervous crash You'll never understand You'll never understand Grounded and bleeding Wounded mystery Mired in needing Hoping you would see Lonely liberty, my identity Bewildered and unburdened Something is calling out to me Untied and drifting Relieved ecstasy Lonely liberty, my identity I rise from another nervous crash You'll never understand You'll never understand I rise from another nervous crash You'll never understand You'll never understand I rise from another nervous crash You'll never understand You'll never understand I rise from another nervous crash You'll never understand You'll never understand I rise from another nervous crash You'll never understand You'll never understand I rise from another nervous crash You'll never understand You'll never understand