.a.i.t.a.

i'm fucking it up & don't know how to fix it throwing my change at the moms of the dead i did the math on jeff bezos' donations i'll beat his ass, donate my three percent i'd be in the streets if it weren't for my vision teargas & contacts just don't make a match i googled the goggles to make me a soldier ten bucks on amazon—fuck me to death am i the asshole? am i the asshole? i spend half my days feeling sorry for someone the rest of my time i feel sorry for me a teacher of mine in a life between music reminded me words make poor apologies so i thank all my haters & flee from the desert the scape of my mind's never been so thirsty still alive in my body i find flowers blooming blossoms whose promise is all sensory am i the apple? am i the apple? when i look at my past i shake at the losses who would've guessed what a loser i'd be? on good days & long nights i sometimes remember surviving each loss makes it cool to be me i'm just one kind of asshole am i the asshole? no no body's ever done this quite like me no body's ever done this quite like me